A Story of My Healing Encounters with Jesus

My spiritual healing journey began about eight years ago when Jesus led me into a prayerful healing relationship with Him. He taught me how to bring my wounded heart to Him so He could enter into my deep wounds and begin to heal them.

These wounds are piercing and deep emotional family wounds, so I knew it would be something that would take a very long time, if not my whole life, to heal. However, little by little, these wounds are healing.

I know they are healing because I have noticed a difference over time in my ability to love and pray with genuine compassion for those who have and continue to hurt me.

I have noticed how I can even do this in the midst of an emotionally hurtful encounter.

Before, I could never do this. I would either get very angry when I was being triggered by something someone did or said, or I would shut down, and so that I might protect myself, I would avoid people and places I knew would trigger me.

Jesus has led me to trust that He will sustain me in these encounters with certain family members who have hurt me, and who at times, I truly believe unknowingly, continue to do so.

I don’t believe I was wrong in the ways I handled these situations. I know there were many times in my past that Jesus knew the best thing for me to do was to remove myself from being in a position of potential further hurt and to allow myself time to heal.

However, over time, as Jesus continued His healing encounters with me, He led me to trust He will sustain me in these encounters with certain family members who have hurt me, and who at times, I truly believe unknowingly, continue to do so.

It is when these wounds are triggered, or when an emotional wound is inflicted for the first time, that I go to silent prayer with my Jesus and allow Him to enter my wounded heart to heal me.

These healing encounters with Jesus are most certainly painful at times. I cannot even say I know exactly what He is doing when He is healing me, only that I am bringing my heart to Him, freely giving Him entrance into these very painful places so He can heal as only He knows how to do.

Most times, I will go to a place I know will be sacred and silent, such as the chapel in a nearby church, where Jesus is present in the Eucharist. Sometimes, I sit in my prayer room at home.

When Jesus engages in these healing encounters with me, it is as if I am undergoing surgery. It is, many times, very emotionally painful. These deep wounds are exposed at a level I would never allow otherwise, and I often sob deeply and cry out in anger over the pain and how these wounds could possibly have been allowed to happen.

Jesus gently mends the wound with His heavenly stitches so His graceful touches can penetrate and permeate this deep wound even after I leave this sacred place of healing.

Jesus is always gentle and never allows this surgery to go on longer than I can handle. Occasionally, He will give me new insights. These insights are always healing and allow me to become more compassionate with myself and those who have hurt me.

And then, when it is time for His healing encounter with me to be over, He gently mends the wound with His heavenly stitches so His graceful touches can penetrate and permeate this deep wound even after I leave this sacred place of healing.

I also must note a difference in how I feel after these healing encounters with Jesus compared to even the most impactful therapy sessions I have had in the past. After therapy sessions in the past where I worked through deep emotional experiences, I would leave feeling both emotionally and physically exhausted from such a huge emotional release. This, of course, is expected and natural — I would dare say even a part of the standard therapeutic healing process.

However, after each healing encounter with Jesus, I notice a different experience. It is as if somehow I can sense a part of my heart was actually healed. Instead of exhaustion, I feel a sense of renewal. I feel a deep peace I had not felt before. I just feel different somehow. I just know that I have been healed, even if only a little, in a very deep place in my soul that only God Himself can enter.

I also know deep down that I will have to come back to this sacred place of healing again and again because not all has been healed. But the next time Jesus penetrates my hurting heart, I know He will not have to go as deep on this particular wound.  

I believe Jesus wants to transform my wounds of pain into wounds that are a vessel for His healing mercy and forgiveness.

Just like His wounded side as He hung on the cross poured forth blood and water to wash away all our sins through His Divine mercy, I believe Jesus wants to transform my wounds of pain into wounds that are a vessel for His healing mercy and forgiveness.

Here is a Prayer for Healing a Wounded Heart that describes some of what I speak to Jesus from my heart in His healing encounters with me.

May the God of mercy and love heal your wounded heart, too, so that you can forgive more easily and love more deeply those who have hurt you. May you be a vessel of His Divine mercy and healing. Amen.

*Please note: In this post, I am speaking of emotional wounds. I would never suggest or believe that Jesus would lead me to subject myself to physical abuse of any kind, nor do I believe He would want anyone to do this. I do not believe that He is asking any reader of this post to subject themselves to any kind of emotional or psychological abuse either. I am only speaking from personal experience of my healing encounters with Jesus.

All that being said, I cannot deny my experience of these healing encounters with Jesus and that it has in fact led me to maintain relationships with those who have been and continue to be hurtful to me. I know it is only through His grace and Divine intervention that I have been able to do so. And I believe I felt called to share this post because there is much more transformative healing He wants to do — He just needs us to hear that this kind of healing is possible.